It seems to me that good speech and good manners are things of the past. Bad speech and bad manners are the future!
Nobody cares about ‘double negatives’ anymore. What’s wrong with ‘ he don love me no more?’ Why bother to speak properly anyway, who cares. …well I do. We have a lovely language, not as pretty as French but when spoken correctly it is charming. The French, thank goodness, are protecting their language but we Brits are slowly stamping out the last of the Queen’s speech. What amazes me is how the hell you are supposed to spell words like, “wot yer lyke,” or “oo yer tink yea aah? “ Admittedly someone speaking with an overly posh voice can be as annoying to listen to. ‘Wal orf we goa!’
I do understand that change happens, but when you hear someone like Ryland Clarke-Neal, (Radio 1 and 2) speaking, perhaps that is a step too far! Maybe we will have to come up with another name for this strange language as I don’t think it could pass for English. Let me say that, other than those huge teeth, I think Ryland does a really good job so he can’t be all bad!
Perhaps It’s too late to save our language now and why care about spelling anyway, what are computers for? We have ‘spell check’ after all!
We have ‘Stella’ or Alexa, whatever it’s called, to find addresses and book a table at a restaurant (do you remember them…ah I miss my restaurants. I have cooking overwork).
We, of course, have ‘Google’…’Google’ that knows everything. I can ask about my sex life, my bowels, find courses to teach me pottery, in fact why do I bother with a brain.
If I want to moan more I can say that I even miss telephone alarm calls in the morning…I miss dialling 100 to chat to the operator or 151 to find a telephone number…(must throw my address book away!)
When sending a text the little man inside my phone takes over. I am forced to text to people under 30 as they don’t look at their emails, don’t listen to voicemails. Maybe I just have fat fingers, but I clearly tap in a word and it changes it…how can ‘meet you at the café’ turn into ‘maximum carriage?’…drives me mad!
Another annoying thing is people who say, ‘you have 2 choices.’ It should be ‘you have a choice.’ It’s as bad as saying, ‘you have 2 twins!’
It won’t be long before we stop speaking altogether….we can just send texts. We don’t have time to talk to people anyway, life is too fast. You can’t even flirt anymore, well perhaps you can if you ‘face time’ someone. I presume soon, one will be able to have sex on an App called ‘virtual sex,’ and have an orgasm via Facetime!
I’ve just been told it’s already happening…bet it’s not as much fun as it used to be!
Well I suppose I just have to get used to this new way of living, but I crave for a hug, or even a cuddle, someone to nibble my ear lobe, I miss a juicy kiss…even a peck will do at the moment!
